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Posted on Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Topic: Diary of the Dragon Prince
Diary of the Dragon Prince Barry reads a letter from an admirer in this instalment of his totally fictitious, completely unbelievable and entirely ridiculous imaginary diary.

1 April 2008 (Tuesday)

I received a registered letter from Peasantland Speedpost Express service. There was a date and time stamp on the envelope and it was postmarked Woodylands Post Office. Inside was a letter signed by a Mas S.K. Damn, that name sounds familiar but I just can't recall where I have seen that name. I threw the envelope away as I don't think the information would be of any use.

I opened the letter and read.

"Dear Emperor, I have enjoyed my brief stay in this wonderful green and woody island of yours. I have enjoyed your hospitality and the facilities at Whitley were great, especially the toilet. The service was also good and I got friendly with the staff. Although security was tight, there is still a holiday resort ambience."

"I must complain though that the passage to get out of Peasantland is just a tad too slow and immigration is taking too long. Still I should not complain because I took only 3 hours and 55 minutes to clear immigration. I hear shortly after that it takes a few hours, and even days, to clear immigration."

"I have confidence in your government. I have specially penned a tribute to your government. It is inspired by the 1969 song by Zager and Evans 'In The Year 2525'. I hope you'd like it."


Mas SK

P.S. I am now relaxing in Batam and drinking Tiger beer. I must say that your country brews a damn good beer that is of international standard. I can't say the same about your internal security though.”


In the year 2525
ISD said Mas Selamat is still alive
Jamban Wong said morale is still high
They have searched the moon and Mars
They are sure they will soon catch Mas

In the year 3535
Big Brother is watching the peasants' lives
The ERP gantries are equipped with GPRS technology
To monitor those who are incorrect politically

In the year 4545
Few peasants want to live past 85
Living is a burden as the cost of living is sky high
MRT suicides is the hip way to die

In the year 5555
The HOTA claims the peasants' bodies and lives
To get soil for land reclamation
The organs are traded to the Martians

In the year 6565
Peasantland is one super GRC with a cabinet of 5
1 PM, 2 SM, 1 Super SM and 1 Minister Rigor Mortis
Supported by 90 ministers in the PM's office

In the year 7575
Ministers are genetically bred and have long lives
From the same genes they look like one familee
And all attribute their success to meritocracy

In the year 8585
Temasekshimaya's losses continue to pile high
Every planet and galaxy they ventured so bold
Throwing money into a literal black hole

In the year 9595
GIC has zillions and non-accountability is fine
They bought planet, stars and the Milky Way
To tally will take a million man-years and a day

Now it's been 10,000 years
The peasants have cried a billion tears
For what they never knew
Still the MIW's rule is not through
But through the eternal night
The twinkling of starlight
So very far away
Maybe it's only yesterday

In the year 2525… (fades away)

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