Hotel BMTC

(to the tune of Hotel California)

Down Seletar Expressway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell from the cookhouse, 
Rising up through the air 
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a fluorescent light 
Nee Soon Medical Centre
I had to stop for the night 

There they stood in the doorway, my OC 
And PC as well 
I was thinking to myself 
This can't be Heaven, this has to be Hell 

And they opened the tonner, and they showed me the way 
There were sergeants down that corridor, 
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the Hotel BMTC 
Such a garang place (such a garang place), 
Such a garang face 
Kena confine at the Hotel BMTC 
All throughout the year (all throughout the year), 
You can find me here 

His mind was certainly twisted, 
He had a sadistic bent 
He had a lot of other PTIs he calls "friends"
Going round the parade square
Sweet summer sweat 
Route march to remember, 
Route march to forget 

So I called up the OO, 
I said "Sir, I want to die"
But he said, "We haven't had a suicide here since 1999."
And still those voices are calling from far away 
Wake you up in the middle of the night 
Just to hear them say 

Welcome to the Hotel BMTC 
FAIBEE-AXE! (FAIBEE-AXE!) 
Faibee-axe
Plenty of canteen breaks at BMTC 
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise)
Get your alibis 

Lizards on the ceiling, houseflies in your eyes 
We are all just prisoners here of the Army's device 
And in the Specialists' Chambers, they gathered for the feast 
They stabbed it with their plastic knives 
But they just can't cut the beef 

Last thing I remember 
I was running for the door 
I had to find a passage back to the place I was before 
"Relac ah, brudder," said the RP, "until you ORD...
"You can book out anytime you like 
But you can never leave!"

--contributed by Kampung Chicken

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